Monday, May 13, 2013

Agchk!

Ugh. I never seem to be able to finish anything! Well... that's not entirely true. I just never seem to finish things I want to do... I have no problem finishing things I have to do like work, chores, and school (I graduated, right?). I find it so odd that I would waste all of my energy into things that don't bring me a sense of pride and happiness. I think it's because I have such a strong desire to please others and not disappoint anyone I'm close to that I first make sure that's not going to happen and by the time I have the chance to do something for myself I figure "what's the use?" Doing chores pleases me in the end because I love having a clean living space. But that only lasts so long and I have nothing to show for it unless I have people over, which is NEVER. I'm not really happy in the place I currently live, but I'm taking the opportunity given to Ben and me by my parents to live in this house for very cheap while we figure things out. Beggars can't be choosers, right?

I just don't know how to go about choosing what I want to do for the rest of my life and then how to attain it. Or even to just do stuff and stop worrying about it. After I found out that Hyperpole and a Half was back, I went over and read her first post and it describes me to the T. If you battle with depression, or think you might have it, or know someone who's clinically depressed, read this post. I perfectly describes what someone goes through.